My wife said that Kyle called and wanted me to fix some things around the house.Things like the outside water faucet, the lawn mower, the back door, etc. I have been bad about getting things fixed around the house. I am trying to do better.
She says I would do anything for Kyle. She caught me off guard. I do like him a lot and I am guilty of doing a lot of things for him. He is only here for a short time. I just like to use my connections to help his stay here be the best possible. I have a crush on him.
She says you love him don't you. Yes, I do. There are things I do love about him. I love the way he makes me feel when in his presence. I love his Christlike nature. I love his desire to do good and make our town a better place to live. I love how he takes care of the poor and the needy. The kids love him so much. I see it when he is spending time with them. They hug and love him so. I love his smile. It is contagious. I love going hiking with him. He wants to see as much of Utah before he leaves. I want to help him do that.
My wife asks were does she fit in the picture? She says she does not have what I need. She cries and asks if I want to leave and discover my other needs. It breaks my heart she feels this way. I do love her with all my heart, mind and soul. I don't want to leave. I just have this other need that is never going away, I can't suppress it anymore. I need my Moho and guy friends.
I am all scrambled up inside. I don't know how to unscramble things. I want to but I can't. Sometimes when I think about it I cry.